Breaking the Cycle!

I don't know about you, but I tend to hide things. I don't like to burden others with the pain I might be going through. I have spent most of my life trying to validate other people's feelings, discount my own, and change myself so others will see the person I think they want to see.

I have always thought that if I can be happy, bubbly, and extroverted, I will be liked and appreciated. I have spent half of my life trying to make someone else happy. I started dating around the age of 15. I remember how broken-hearted I was after my first heartbreak. I remember trying to understand why he broke my heart and why I wasn't good enough. I spent the next 15 years trying to prove that I was worthy of love. I also spent 15 years not talking about my pain and my hurt.

I had an epiphany over the past few weeks. Without going into too much detail, I woke up from the fog I was living in and realized I have been trying to prove that I was lovable for the past 15 years but I didn't know how to love myself. I started talking about my pain and talking about what I've been going through. And like a ray of light, I no longer have to prove to anyone that I deserve to be loved because I have found a love for myself that was never there before.

Like all things, we have to find a tribe of people that surround us with positivity. We have to talk about what we are going through. Let people in and let people help! As I have learned to be more open about what I'm going through, I have also learned to be more open about how to ask others what they are going through. With the suicide prevention work that I am so blessed to be apart of, I encourage you to ask and share! Let others know they aren't alone. Tell them that you care. Be a part of their tribe!